ＨＯＷ ＣＡＮ Ａ ＨＥＡＶＹ ＨＥＡＲＴ ＢＥ ＳＯ ＥＭＰＴＹ？

[ambitious]

  ＢＯＲＲＯＷＩＮＧ Ａ ＢＲＯＫＥＮ ＬＯＶＥ．

✘ select a muse
✘ leave a prompt ( threadstarter/picture(s)/lyrics, etc )
✘ profit!

Comments

[adronitis]

Maybe I'll get a devotional candle for myself, too, then we'll match.

I'd get a key cut for you to mark the occasion but you've had one for months.

[victimized]

cute, if a little weird.
probably best to keep those in the bedroom.
people might think we've lost it.

[ not that she actually cares, but... ]

you could always just come home and kiss me.
unless you're still hanging out at the hardware store.

[adronitis]

We are weird.
You don't think we should display our matching heretical religious iconography out in the open where any of your friends can see them?
Brooke. You don't let me have any fun.

I needed to get some stuff. I want to build a pergola for the backyard.

[victimized]

well obviously
i just thought you might not want to advertise it
but hey, i'll put them on the entryway table so it's the first thing people see if you want.

which is your way of saying you're still there, right?
i didn't know you had an actual plan, but that'll look nice.

[adronitis]

If we're going to have devotional candles, they really deserve a shrine.
We should go all out.
Really freak out my parents when they come visit.

This is more complicated than I had anticipated it would be.
I want to grow wisteria.

[victimized]

now see, i was with you until you brought your parents into this.
i want them to like me. or keep liking me.
things don't exactly go well if they think i'm this horrible gringo heretic who entranced their son.

i know how much you hate it when i call you adorable, but you know you kind of are, right?

[adronitis]

Honey I went to art school.
They're used to strange installations. If anything, they'd blame me for dragging you into my weirdness.
They like you just fine.

Because I've been bested by home improvement projects?

[victimized]

see, you say that, but you're their son
part of that whole "we support you no matter what" thing.
i just don't want them thinking i corrupted you or something.

because you keep trying new ones anyway.

[adronitis]

That's what they tell me.
If anyone's done any corrupting here, I'm pretty sure it's me.
Besides, you've come to church with me a couple times. That's the opposite of corruption.

I won't let this stupid thing beat me. I'm going to get this built.

[victimized]

i've seen the three of you together. i wouldn't doubt it.
please. mr white knight, corrupting me?
i don't think you're even capable of it. no offense.

i have the utmost faith in you. but i'll be here just in case it falls apart.

[adronitis]

They're so embarrassing.
Who's over a decade older than who here?
I know you're probably right, but you could at least pretend.

I appreciate your lukewarm support, babe.

[victimized]

i'm sorry, you're right.
you're a horrible influence.
i was young and naive and then you came along
and completely destroyed my innocence.
...too much.

that's what i'm here for.

[adronitis]

Little bit.
I was with you until the very last bit, though.

You're so good at this girlfriend thing. I'm so lucky.

[victimized]

then for the sake of your ego
i retract that last line. everything else stands.

just so long as you recognize that. 😜

[adronitis]

Thank you, I appreciate that.

I'd have to be a fucking idiot not to recognize that. And I like to consider myself moderately intelligent.

[victimized]

moderately, he says.
as if you're not possibly the smartest person i know.

[adronitis]

See, I told you you were good at this girlfriend thing.
And I appreciate the lie, but a deep well of useless trivia does not equal intelligence.

[victimized]

that's the kind of thing most people walk through life with.
random knowledge about useless trivia.
that doesn't make it a lie in this case.

[adronitis]

At least I know I'm useful at trivia night at bars.
As long as they don't ask about sports.

[victimized]

i think you're supposed to get teams together for stuff like that.
you just need to have a sports guy on call.
you'll be a hell of a lot more helpful than i would.

[adronitis]

Alright, so I'm politics and dated sci-fi, what's your speciality?

[victimized]

does that mean we need someone else entirely for current sci-fi?
since fashion is highly unlikely to come up in bar trivia, pop culture seems like the obvious response.

[adronitis]

I think I can brush up enough on Game of Thrones or whatever enough to keep us afloat.
That's too bad, you're so knowledgable about fashion. Pop culture will be useful though. How much do you know about the Kardashians?

[victimized]

are you sure you really want to know the answer to that?
it may completely change your opinion of me.

[adronitis]

Sweetheart I already know how much you like reality TV.
Don't think I haven't noticed all the Dance Moms in my DVR queue.