seldomly | ＨＯＷＣＡＮＡＨＥＡＶＹＨＥＡＲＴＢＥＳＯＥＭＰＴＹ？

we probably could have made his head explode.
remind me, i'll totally come with you next time.

I can't believe the potential to make racists uncomfortable is all I need to convince you to come to the hardware store with me.
I knew I liked you for a reason. ❤️

i'm not saying i'm going to enjoy the entire trip, but that possibility of calling some dick out is totally worth it.
here i thought you were just into me because of my great ass.

Nobody enjoys an entire trip to Home Depot.
Plus you'd get the pleasure of my company, right?

Your ass is amazing, there's no denying that. But it's only one of the reasons I'm into you.

i do like spending time with you
so it that involves shopping in one of the most boring stores on earth
i suppose i can make do.

i'd ask for the list but i'm guessing it hasn't changed much since the last time.

You're a saint, sweetheart.

I am always adding to it, but the main points are the same.

i don't want to flat out deny the title
but believe it or not, it doesn't take much to want to hang out with you.
like i said before. you're pretty great.
and not exactly hard to look at 😜

I'll get a devotional candle made for you, how's that?
Is that so? I guess that explains why you're always hanging around my house.
Well, that and the fact that you live there.

Stop it, you'll make me blush.

does that mean you're going to worship me?
because i'm not going to complain about that.

to be fair, the house is way more comfortable than my shitty dorm was.
but i like you. falling asleep with you. waking up with you.
everything in between.

you're so cute when you blush, though.

Every night.

Why do you even still keep your dorm room? Aren't you paying for that?
Next semester you should just give up paying for on-campus housing, you're hardly ever there. Move in with me officially.
I like that too. The house feels very lonely when you're not around.

Not as cute as you.

and you say i'm the saint.

i'd like to pay something about about being a strong, independent woman but really it's just because i paid for the semester up front.
i like the sound of official, though. if you're sure.
not going to freak out when you lose the opportunity to tell me to go home if you want to, are you?

close, though.

I'm pretty sure no one has ever been sainted for anything nearly as enjoyable as worshiping you.

Why tf would I tell you to go home? You'd already be home.
It's not like you'd be chained up in the house all day. You'd still have class to go to and your friends to hang out with, you'd just be coming back to me when you're done.
I like having you around.

Idk about that...

you're right. it's usually the exact opposite of enjoyable.
but you're a special case.

and i like being around.
so alright then. it's officially official.
your home is my home.

Maybe I'll get a devotional candle for myself, too, then we'll match.

I'd get a key cut for you to mark the occasion but you've had one for months.

cute, if a little weird.
probably best to keep those in the bedroom.
people might think we've lost it.

[ not that she actually cares, but... ]

you could always just come home and kiss me.
unless you're still hanging out at the hardware store.

We are weird.
You don't think we should display our matching heretical religious iconography out in the open where any of your friends can see them?
Brooke. You don't let me have any fun.

I needed to get some stuff. I want to build a pergola for the backyard.

well obviously
i just thought you might not want to advertise it
but hey, i'll put them on the entryway table so it's the first thing people see if you want.

which is your way of saying you're still there, right?
i didn't know you had an actual plan, but that'll look nice.

If we're going to have devotional candles, they really deserve a shrine.
We should go all out.
Really freak out my parents when they come visit.

This is more complicated than I had anticipated it would be.
I want to grow wisteria.

now see, i was with you until you brought your parents into this.
i want them to like me. or keep liking me.
things don't exactly go well if they think i'm this horrible gringo heretic who entranced their son.

i know how much you hate it when i call you adorable, but you know you kind of are, right?

Honey I went to art school.
They're used to strange installations. If anything, they'd blame me for dragging you into my weirdness.
They like you just fine.

Because I've been bested by home improvement projects?

see, you say that, but you're their son
part of that whole "we support you no matter what" thing.
i just don't want them thinking i corrupted you or something.

because you keep trying new ones anyway.

That's what they tell me.
If anyone's done any corrupting here, I'm pretty sure it's me.
Besides, you've come to church with me a couple times. That's the opposite of corruption.

I won't let this stupid thing beat me. I'm going to get this built.

i've seen the three of you together. i wouldn't doubt it.
please. mr white knight, corrupting me?
i don't think you're even capable of it. no offense.

i have the utmost faith in you. but i'll be here just in case it falls apart.

They're so embarrassing.
Who's over a decade older than who here?
I know you're probably right, but you could at least pretend.

I appreciate your lukewarm support, babe.

i'm sorry, you're right.
you're a horrible influence.
i was young and naive and then you came along
and completely destroyed my innocence.
...too much.

that's what i'm here for.

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